Sleep Reading

We’ve all heard of sleep walking and what kind of problems it can create. I have the interesting phenomenon of sleep reading. Reading makes me sleepy no matter what the subject may be. Text books are snooze fests, of course, but even when I was reading my recent favorites my eyelids would get so heavy I’d have to take a little break to “rest my eyes” during the read.

I have to read a lot to Reagan for history. They’re not usually text books so they’re never dry, but I just can’t help getting sleepy. Reagan can tell when I’m getting sleepy too. My speech will slow down and I’ll start to slur words. I swear I don’t drink during homeschool, y’all. She’ll nudge me and say, “Mom, are you getting tired?” This is usually my cue to cut it right there and end history for the day.

Today we were reading about Winston Churchill. I could tell I was getting tired so I started opening my eyes wide, forcing myself to pay attention to the words. Nothing would help. Now, Churchill led an interesting life, but for the life of me I couldn’t stay awake. This day I didn’t start slurring my words or slowing my speech. I just started sleep reading.

What I was supposed to read:

I suggested that we should immediately, pending further news, rush a dozen great ships crammed with provisions into Hamburg.*

Instead, what I sleep read was:

I suggested that we should immediately, pending further news, rush a dozen shrimps covered in bread crumbs…

and then I “woke up”. I could tell something I just “read” wasn’t quite right.

I asked Reagan, “what did I just say?” And she repeated the shrimps quote. We both busted out laughing. Ah yes, never a dull moment during history class at our house. Who knows what Reagan learned today about Winston Churchill. She’ll forever think he’s got some kind of shrimp fetish.

*Winston Churchill: British Soldier, Writer, Statesman by Brenda Haugen

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6 thoughts on “Sleep Reading

  1. Gretchen says:

    i love it!!! i don’t know how you read all that historical stuff and not snooze through it all. karl is always after me to read more “intelligent” books, but i know that i wouldn’t make it…..

    • Vicki says:

      These are kid-level books, thankfully. Skips over most of the boring stuff. 🙂 Start with this book. Go check it out at the library and think of me when you come across the shrimps…

  2. I can SO relate!
    I am a big lover of reading and books, but if I’m tired, I can not force it.
    Like you, I slur and hesitate as I try to focus when reading to them if I’m tired. And my kids pick up on it right away too. (They are older now, but still enjoy the family reading time.)When reading to my kids a few years ago – the American Girl Kaya book – one of the character’s name is Brown Deer, and no matter how hard I tried, I kept calling her Brown Bear.
    My kids would crack up and have never let me forget it.

  3. I am exactly the same…. 🙂 Glad I am not the only one…. Eli nudges me and asks what I am saying because my words are slurred… I even do it to fun chapter books… they put me right to sleep… it is awful.

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