Not So SAHM

What to do in the mountains

Here’s what I’ve learned to do so far while “resting” in the mountains: (we’re in the north Georgia mountains if I haven’t mentioned that)

(Spring hasn’t quite sprung but the view from our deck is still wonderful)

Don’t try to type on your phone while riding in the car. By no means was I driving, but the roads were so curvy and up and down that even typing a quick message (to Lula: we saw Booger Hollow) make me feel like barfing a little. I didn’t used to get motion sick at all, and I can still read in a car for hours…but I guess no longer on mountain roads.
Have at least two different navigational systems. And access to essential phone numbers. After finding our cabin and unpacking we headed back out to stock the pantry and fridge. Over the river and through the woods…and over the river and through the woods…and over the river and through the woods. We almost didn’t make it to the store even though we were using both the GPS on my phone and Jeeves. My phone didn’t have Ingles in the correct position and Jeeves didn’t even know Ingles existed in that neck of the woods. What finally saved us what calling the store and having the customer service angel lead us there.
Bring your nerves of steel. Once you get into the mountains you will be enraptured by the beauty and tranquility. You will instinctively pick up every single homes and land magazines that you see. You will pour over every picture looking for the perfect house or land with the perfect view. You will force your husband to do some mortgage calculations while you wipe the drool off the pages so they don’t stick because you’re going to keep these magazines as inspiration and motivation to start saving even more money for retirement.
When you’re in Blairsville, Georgia you must eat at The Aviator Cafe. I’m slurping on a bowl of tomato bisque as I type and Reagan’s chowing down on Deli chicken noodle soup. The prices are right and the internet is free. Cool music and an even cooler atmosphere (there are planes everywhere so we feel kind of at home) make it a great blogging experience.
Watch where you’re driving! You will have the insatiable urge to look out the side windows more often than the windshield as that is where most of the mountains and beautiful scenery tend to be. This can cause great danger since, remember, the roads aren’t straight and most of the other drivers probably aren’t sober. Also, old people think they own the road and will pull out in front of you.

I’m sure I’ll have more advice as the days linger on. We are indeed relaxing. And were we independently wealthy I doubt proper civilization would see us ever again.

We’re always busy. Getting kids up, making breakfast, making them get clean, making them do school, cleaning the house (sometimes), fixing lunch, making and going to appointments, gym, dance, girl scouts, dinner, making sure Ashlyn isn’t sitting on the cats or writing on the walls. Hold on a minute, I need a breath. We’re always busy.

This week our mandate is different though:

RELAX

I checked the definition in the dictionary since I don’t use that word often, and that’s indeed what we need to be doing. We’re headed off on our own “Spring Break” for a little r&r in the north Georgia Mountains. A nice cabin. Mountain views. 3 acres. Actual books to read. Hot tub. God is even providing rainy weather so we won’t feel obligated to be on the move everyday. We still have the kids though so nix all those hot tub thoughts. I wouldn’t tell you anyway.

Aside: this is another bonus of homeschooling–we can take vacation whenever Du’s job will allow it. No waiting for the school system to tell us when we can travel. I think I’ve mentioned this before though.

The most we’ll do is a little bit of hiking or geocaching. My mom will join us midweek and my brother and his wife will come up on Friday. I brought Siedler, Richard, and another game. Get ready to lose…well, I’ll be playing so you’ll probably win.

There’s one thing I’m trepidacious about. The cabin has no internet service. I know! I’m crying a little inside as I write this. I don’t even know if my phone will pick up a signal out there. Even if it does it will be E and not 3G and so slow that it wouldn’t be worth being online on my phone anyway. Can you tell I’m nervous? I have a backup plan though. The lady making my reservation assured me that both a local cafe and the library have access to the outside world. I may be making a few trips…

After all, if I’m all worked up about not having internet access I won’t be relaxing will I? I think it’s a perfect compromise to not be hooked up at the cabin and then get a little fix along with a little chai in town. Totally relaxing on both points.

We’re practicing being relaxed right now though. Slowly easing into it so our systems aren’t shocked. We’re in the Atlanta area right now visiting some friends that have become so close to us none of us feel like we have to be entertained. You know that feeling? When you can just go to someone’s house and read in a chair all day while they do their normal daily routine and nobody feels like they’re being left out or they need to attend to you? I’d say it’s a perfect transition to our Spring Break week.

So, I’m possibly signing off for a week (you should be pretty used to sporadic posting by me now anyway). If I can manage I’ll post a little from the cafe. Or the library. Or my phone if there’s service.

Our heads are firmly planted in…

“The video below is of Dr. Abdull@h @l-N@fisi, a Kuwaiti, educated in Egypt (through high school), who earned his BA at the (quite anti-American) American University in Beirut and ultimately his PhD in political science from Cambridge University, UK. He has been a visiting professor at Harvard and Stanford, a former member of the Kuwaiti Parliament and now a distinguished academic and political commentator at Kuwait University. He is one of the more respected Mu$lim intellectuals in the world today. He has students and ardent followers. They are listening to him while they sit in Venezuela, Mexico City, Los Angeles, Palo Alto, Cambridge, Brooklyn, D.C.”

Remember rationality and context. Listen to the audience’s response to his comments (laughter, etc.). He was a Visiting Professor at Harvard and Stanford.

This will take a couple of minutes to watch. But it is worth it. Do you still think about 9/11? Do you think about how there are evil people in this world who want to kill us just because we’re Americans? Get your head out of the sand because that’s exactly what this guy hopes you’re doing.

Dare we call this an incitement to terrorism? Or will J@net N@politano look down on us for using that word? What should we call it now? Her euphemism: a “man caused disaster?” When her neighbors’ insides bleed out because someone has sprinkled @nthrax around Washington like “confetti” will she still be so euphemistic and call the murder of 330,000 Americans a “man caused disaster”? Doesn’t that just seem wrong to dumb it down like that?

These I$l@mic extremi$ts are out there. There is no negotiating with them. We can stick our metaphorical hand out all we want but they will not reciprocate. And we’re reducing the size of our military? For what? So it will be easier to wave the white flag? It only takes one person to do that (and I’ll tell you who’s holding the flag right now if you ask me). We may not need more tanks to fight them, but we do need trained people who know how to fight an enemy that is not a specific state.

It’s so obvious that this man has lost all value of human life. Did he ever have it? Was he raised learning to hate? We still (somewhat) value human life. He and his cohorts couldn’t care less about souls and bodies. I have something to say to him. God cares. Vengeance is the Lord’s and God may not seek vengeance on these evil people in this life, but you can be certain their souls go straight to Hell when they blow themselves up or inhale the anthrax that they’ve just spread into our populated cities. There is no heaven with seventy virgins.

Why our media isn’t reminding us daily that there are people in this world who are out to kill us is mind boggling. If there were a mass murderer or serial killer loose it would be on the news every night. People, there are mass murderers and serial killers sneaking into our country right now. Are you bold enough to say there aren’t? Ignorant enough to believe it couldn’t be happening? How secure is our southern border? When is it too late to realize that we’ve been sticking our heads in the sand? Once 330,000 people are murdered?

I’ll leave you with one of his main ideas: Those who we (used to) call “terrori$ts” are “the most honorable people in the world, the best people in the world.”

P.S. Sorry for the conspiracy theorist way that I use @ and $ symbols in certain words. I just don’t want these types of posts to be easily found using searches of those words.

Shuffle Off To…

…anyone a tap dancer out there?

I just realized it’s been a week since I last posted. I wish I had grand stories to tell you of amazing shopping trips and feasts worthy of foody magazines. Actually, I kind of do so maybe I’ll share those tomorrow. This past weekend most of my mother’s family congregated in Pensacola to celebrate the life of her mother, my Mamaw. She was laid to rest on Saturday…I don’t think I should use the term laid to rest though. She is in Heaven with a perfect mind and a perfect body just waiting for us to join her. Resting probably isn’t on her agenda. Dancing maybe. Shuffling perhaps. Marana tha.

My husband is going to have me shuffling soon as well. Not exactly the shuffling off to buffalo that I was doing whilst pregnant with Reagan. You should have seen me at tap class with my protruding stomach, trying to balance and look graceful. On second thought, no you shouldn’t.

This shuffle is tiny. And pink. He certainly knows me. It will match my iPhone but, I can’t really run with my iPhone can I? I’m trying to start running again. (Sheepish grin) Can I legitimately say that after having only run twice in two weeks? The last time I ran was last April (Accountability April one or two of you will remember) when I was determined to get in shape. I literally felt like my uterus was going to fall out.

You’ll be happy to know that this time no body parts were in danger of leaving their designated places. And I ran three miles(!) instead of that paltry one a year ago. My knees did feel like stiff putty though. And I was so sore I could barely move.

Yesterday I ran again and felt much better all around. I’m attributing this success somewhat to the fact that Du lent me his Nano and therefore I had something on which to concentrate other than my normal, “Lord, when will this be done? Breathe in, two three. Breathe out, two three. Breathe…jeez, when will I be done running already? Maybe if I count down…let’s see…I can’t have thirty more minutes left…so if I (huff, puff)…count down from…what would that be?…30 minutes x 60 seconds per minute…crap, I have a cramp…”

Yes, so, ahem, the music helped tremendously. My husband being the loving husband that he is surprised me today with my very own iPod Shuffle. Now I don’t have an excuse not to run. Did I mention that he gets all excited when I start exercising and begin the healthy living regimens? I really should start and stop these more often so he has a chance to get excited more.

This time I hope to make the healthy living shtick stick. I got my cholesterol level taken the other day and the number isn’t pretty. 238. I know! You’re shocked right? I was told to “make lifestyle changes”, which is a euphemism for stop eating and drinking all of the exciting things you’re used to and start eating and drinking all that boring stuff that tastes, oh, about like paper. Oh, and start excercising. I guess chasing after a two year old everyday isn’t enough. I’m trying to be determined because I know one of the number one killers of women in the US is heart disease. I don’t want that to be me. I want to be taken with the trumpets and not drop dead because I couldn’t quit eating M&Ms.

So, please say a prayer for me that I will start to enjoy running. That I will start to enjoy the taste of water and healthy food. That I will get that runner’s high or whatever you’re supposed to feel after running (when I ran cross country the best part of the race was the end. Not because I got a runner’s high but because the team went to eat an awesome meal that we didn’t have to pay for). Just pray for me.

P.S. I forgot! I have to put some music on this Shuffle! I need good running music. Ideas?

Frugal vs Fast

I mentioned on one of my posts recently something about how you can either be frugal or be fast. I don’t know, maybe it was a month ago already. The calendar seems to be leaping forward in two day increments, at least, nowadays. Just yesterday it was Saturday. I swear. But the calendar says four days have passed. Is that why I feel 27 but look…somewhat older?

I’m nothing if not frugal. There are precious few things that I will spend full dollar on, and even then I’ve got to be in the right mood. Like when I recently paid full price for the shoes that I’m going to be wearing to a wedding in April. On the beach. Oh yeah. But I’m actually saving money because I’m wearing a dress that I already own and I bought jewelry on clearance. That’s my logic.

So, frugal I am and therefore I’ve noticed that I cannot make a decision about things without first consulting at least twelve different websites or visiting six different stores all the while trying to break records on how cheap I can get something. Why pay full price when I know full well that it can be found for cheaper? I try to beat William Shatner at his own game. And I’ve done it too. Just call me the original Priceline negotiator. Try $79 a night for a four bedroom house in Orlando. Try $25 for a pair of $220 pants. Make that three pairs. I go cheap or go home.

But all that internet research and store hopping, while fun, takes up time. I’m realizing that time is more and more of a precious commodity these days. Before kids I could spend a week online…nonstop…without batting an eye. Well, I would blink or else my eyeballs would be raisins but you get the point. I could spend innumerable hours finding the best deal on whatever it was we were searching for. I’m sad now because I’m losing the rationality to do that. Apparently people need fed, clothes need washed, and the house needs cleaned. Oh, I guess the cats need their litter changed too. See what all I have to do that now takes up precious time? It gets harder and harder to justify the hours of searching it takes to find the truly good deals.

I wish I could just say, “Hmm, we want to take a vacation. I’m going to go to this one website and do it all from there. Without researching. Case closed. Honey we’re going to the mountains and it’s going to cost you a kidney. Mk?” It was hard for me to even type that. Even now I’m wanting to hit the delete key. I would have to check just one more site to see if per chance that elusive deal would strike on the second go around. I’m starting to sound like a gambler.

I guess I need to mentally acknowledge which situations actually need the detailed research and deal finding. I mean really, does finding the best deal on shoes really matter? In that regard I’m making small breakthroughs. Those wedding shoes I bought full price the other day? I went into Dillards, found the jewelry (on clearance), went to the shoe section, told the shoe lady what I was looking for and bought the first pair she showed me. It was kind of exhilarating. I mean, I hadn’t even looked at another pair, much less another store! And I’m living to tell about it. But I guess you’d have to take my shopping logic into account (see above).

For now I am not going to quit cold turkey. It is the best feeling to find big deals, like the four bedroom house for the price of a drive-by motel. But I’m also realizing that some of my best deals I have just stumbled upon. Like the $145 pair of shoes that I got for $18.

Free pedicures!

Every year, when the first signs of warmer weather appear, when the first inklings of spring show, women far and near feel the same little nudging of fear and regret. Why oh why did we not take care of our heels throughout the winter?

You know what I’m talking about. That first day when the winter weather surprises you by actually being warm enough for those cute little sandals. So you pick out a cute spring-y outfit and go to slip on the sandals when that wave of fear creeps over you. As you slowly slip the strap over your heel you lightly feel with your fingers. You then venture to take a peek. “How old am I and who has replaced my young skin with this rhino hide?”

Heels go through their own little version of hell in the winter. They are mistreated and abused and are thought of oh, for about 3.2 seconds. But to me they’re one of the main things that can tell a woman’s age, or how well she takes care of herself. Ladies, heels must be thought about before that first spring-y day if you’re going to freely wear the footwear of your choice. At least a week before.

Many women quickly make an appointment with their pedicurist to take care of winter’s damage. I, however, am cheap frugal and logical and realize that I could do the same thing to myself without having to sit through a session of “what did she just say about me in that language I don’t understand?” You don’t need some kind of paraffin wrap, a leg massage and a dose of unsecure feelings in order to have great looking feet. All you need is this:

Well, something more on the left side of the picture. Those razor things on the right scare me. I couldn’t find my exact model online so I had to resort to picture taking:

This is my pedicure file. This is (hopefully) all you need along with some cute nail polish. Rub your heels (and other stubborn parts of your feet) with this every time you get out of the shower and I promise within a week your heels will feel smoother than a baby’s butt. That’s right, smoother. Then rub on some thick lotion and wear socks (if you can). I use Mary Kay’s Extra Emollient Night Cream:

Heels are smooth and youthful not old and rhino-y. So, while technically not free, a mere one-time $2.50 could get you baby-butt-smooth heels. And with the other $30 you could go buy some cool new sandals.

Do you have any cheap salon tricks to beautify for the spring?