Not So SAHM

Randompalooza

(Thank you B-Rob for that title)

* I’m researching French immersion classes for the girls. Realizing I’m going to have to sell one of them to afford it.

* I’ve placed myself on a strict diet…of spending, that is. No personal spending in January. This is to make up for what I overspent in December and to start saving for Europe.

*Therefore, I cannot get those cool thermals that everyone is recommending to me until February. And even then I’ll have to see how much spending money I’ve allowed myself for the month.

*I hate starvation spending.

* Ashlyn didn’t even taste her dinner last night and so she is eating it for breakfast. We are mean like that. She will not win that battle though. Obstinance gets you nothing but trouble here.

* Getting my girls to move with a purpose is maybe just a little bit easier than herding cats. Or shoving toothpaste back into the tube.

*Having Reagan do her chores without reminders is just a little bit harder than herding cats or shoving toothpaste back into the tube.

*I have never tried to herd cats or shove toothpaste back into the tube, but I’ve heard that both are next to impossible.

I have this theory that when I talk about underwear I get more readers that day. We’ll see. And I am going to talk about underwear again today. My secret underwear. Since October I have been secretly wearing a certain type of underwear:

I don’t have a pair of women’s thermals and I desperately wanted to wear layers when we went to Boston in October. And since I’m hopelessly cheap frugal I stole them from Du. What is it with me and men’s underwear? I couldn’t believe how much of a difference they made. I was actually not freezing while walking around Boston all day every day in the freezing wind and driving rain. You think I’m exaggerating. I was hooked.

Ever since then, if the temps dip below 50 I’ve got these babies on under my jeans. Skinny jeans that have a low rise. If you can see that dude’s waist up there you’ll see that the thermals rise pretty high. And look at all of that…extra fabric. So now I’ve got a thermal muffin top that billows out above my jeans. It’s like a whole pack of muffin tops.

I’ve also become a fan of wearing really long tops. I’m layering the northern end too for warmth so usually my undertank is long enough to cover the thermal muffin. I can feel the muffin though and it makes me constantly readjust my shirts, pulling up the muffin and pulling down my three or four tops.

Every once in a while I think about getting proper ladies’ thermals. But would they be as warm? There definitely wouldn’t be as much fabric. Also, much less adjusting of my package…pack of muffins. Maybe I’ll try my hand at alterations and try to shorten the fabric and extract the manhole.

So there you have it, my secret underwear. I get weirder every day don’t I?

14 years = underwear

Today my beloved betrothed and I have been bound in wedded bliss for fourteen years.

Aww, that’s sweet, but not sassy. I like my anniversary card to him better:

We’re a good team.

You’re the one who approaches challenges head on…

And I’m the one hanging back, admiring your butt.

Yes, thank you, Hallmark for saying what I could not say myself.

What do you get someone for 14 years of happiness? The traditional gift is ivory. I wouldn’t be opposed to buying or getting vintage ivory, and it seems that the prices are reasonable on ebay.

The modern gift is gold. Gold? Getting a little greedy aren’t we? Gold is the traditional gift for a fifty year anniversary. And funny enough, it’s also the modern gift for fifty years! My guess is that not many people make it to fifty years anymore, either by divorce or death. So, we gotta get our gold in before we bite the dust! And if we make it to our fiftieth wedding anniversary we’ll do gold again!

In this household we don’t do things the way normal people do them. If there’s a trend we’re usually bucking it (except for boots and scarves, I am rocking those this season) SO for our fourteenth anniversary this is what we got each other.

I got…

Oh yes. These are so going to feed my retro desire. I’ve already picked out an outfit to wear with them. I don’t care if it’s two degrees outside. An awesome anniversary present if I do say so myself. Thanks Du! I’ll wear these more than I would ivory, or gold.

What Du is getting…

That’s right, underwear. And?

They’re “compression” underwear, you know, to compress…stuff…while running. Du is getting seriously into running. Like, running in two degree weather running. Things need support, you know. I’m happy to provide it.

I’m a supportive wife.

He hasn’t gotten them yet though. I’m afraid to buy the wrong ones. It’s not like you can wear underwear running and then return them if they’re not the right fit or they compress a little too much. I’m going to force Du to order them and I’ll pay him back or something. How’s that for fourteen years of bliss? At least he’s getting what he wants!

So here’s to fourteen years of marriage. They have been like gold to me and I look forward to the day, in the 36 years, when we can give gold to each other for realz.

I love you, Du!

Godly hedgehog

…or “in which I maintain my ‘goals'”…

I have recently blabbed on here that I’d like to do some things a little better this year. The mostly imagined pressure from my readership has worked all of these 24 hours since writing the last post. Today I

read more (see #3)
sewed more
got a little closer to God (see #1)

To prove that I’m more godly I sewed something biblical today as well (see #2):

It’s my holy hedgehog. He’s a pincushion. Hedgehogs are all in the Bible. I think they were called leviathan back then, or something. So, yeah. Here’s his other side:

He’s ugly as sin. I should knit a little tail and call it a mouse. In sewing Goliath I learned two very important lessons.

I hate hand embroidering. One would think that since I own an embroidery machine and even ran a business with it that I might enjoy a little hand work. False. If I ever make another Goliath I will sew black fabric on for the nose.
I can actually do a french knot and they’re not hard. Who knew? Online tutorial videos are pretty close to a Godsend, especially for someone impatient.

Maybe I’ll show you tomorrow that I actually do know how to sew something a little cute. My biblical monster is sitting on it.

P.S. Here’s a link to the pattern. I’m sure yours will be cuter.

The best laid plans…

Can you finish that quote? I had to look it up.

So, yes, the “best laid schemes. . . go often askew” and New Year’s resolutions have to be at the top of the “best laid schemes” list. Can I get an amen? I read my post from last year discussing my goals for 2009. My goals were to

get in shape
get closer to God
get organized

How did your humble correspondent do in achieving these goals in 2009?

Hahahahahaha! I did start running again sporadically in the spring. I ran some more in the late summer. That’s about it for getting in shape. Oh, wait! How can I forget Jillian Michaels and Wii Fit? My lack of willpower overcame their desire to bust my butt.
Boohoohoo. I have, for years, read through the Bible in a year. Two years ago I decided to do the Bible-in-3-years plan. 2009 was year 2 of the plan. And I didn’t do very well after the move. Not that just reading the Bible will get me closer to God. My Bible study, prayer time and everything else that could get me closer to God suffered.
Hmmm… You kind of have to be organized to move. Then and maybe during the holidays were the only two times I felt organized out of the 365 days that comprised 2009.

So, yes, the best laid plans…

And what am I about to do? Lay more plans. Exactly. Let’s see how depressed I can make myself in 365 more days.

This year I plan to

Sew more. I have a dress form. I have a bazillion patterns I just bought for .99 each at JoAnn. I have a daughter who wants to learn how.
Read more. I have two blog friends to spur me on: Ronnica and Lula read like their lives depend on it. And I’m sure if you asked them they would say it does.
Get closer to God. You (I’m including myself here, but also telling you) will not be happy, content, peaceful, sure about your purpose in life, and generally in a good mood without being close to God. That’s just it.
Go to Europe. Who doesn’t want to do that? I’m going to actually PLAN it though.

Nothing earth shattering. But it’s a good start.

Fill in the blanks

If you were to walk into my home it would be pretty obvious that I’m not much of a decorator. I’ve got things to look at around the house, but I’m no Martha Stewart. My home’s interior will not be featured in any posh magazines. There are three main reasons for this.

1) I am cheap frugal
2) I am becoming more of a minimalist with each move
3) I have about six(ty) other things that take up that kind of brain power on a daily basis

Because of these reasons I tend to unpack the boxes when we move, set things out, and kind of leave them there. I intend to get back to things and make cute little “tablescapes” and “groupings” of interesting objects. And the months roll by. Imagine my nonsurprise and lack of interest when my husband brought something to my attention:

AND?! So what if I have cute frames hanging around the house with no picture in them? One can see an effort has been made, right? So what if one of those frames hasn’t been filled in SEVEN years. Ahem.

The cute wooden frame with the owl. I got that on clearance at Target earlier this year. I had the idea to put a picture of the girls in there and put it in the playroom. It’s in the playroom.

The Disney frame we actually got at Disney, in February of 2008. My idea was to insert pictures of us at Disney. At least there are Disney characters in there now.

Reagan gave me the butterfly frame in Missouri…three years ago. I actually never got as far as thinking about what picture to put in here. It’s just sentimental to me because Reagan picked it out and gave it to me.

The big insult: the silver frame with three openings…um, I had the heartwarming idea to put a picture of baby Du on the left, a picture of baby Me on the right and then a picture of baby Reagan in the middle. This was before Reagan was even born…she’ll be eight in February.

The two gingerbread men only remind me of my dilatory ways in December. I think I only got them last year, too. And seeing as how I can’t get my stuff together to print pictures out the other eleven months of the year, it’s not looking too good to get these two guys pictured-up before next Christmas.

Sigh, and Du wants a whole wall of frames filled with family members. And my mother keeps hinting that she would like to have pictures sent to her, from me, of our kids. . . .