Socially Acceptable Responses

I’m coming across several social situations where I think I might need some outside guidance. Here’s one for you…

Situation: The people across the street from us like to park one of their vehicles on the road. Right behind our driveway. It’s a fairly narrow road. I drive a honkin’ SUV. My driveway is narrow as well so there is no room for me to begin the swinging around process in the driveway. I must wait to turn the tires until I get backed out into the street. Well, if I wait until I’m far enough into the street…you can guess what could happen. Thousands of dollars in car repairs.

There is plenty more road where the neighbors could park. Hey, there’s even their driveway. Novel idea to some, so maybe it’s not that obvious to them. If they could just not park their vehicle in that ten feet of space all would be well.

The plot thickens: They brought us food one night. Should we go over there and say something like: “hey! Thanks for the food! Could you quit parking your car there? Yeah, I know we just moved in, but you see, the way you do it is not logical and beneficial for everyone involved.” Hmmmm.

International Crisis: They’ve been living here longer than we have. They’re not native English speakers and they’re of a nationality that’s been getting bad press for the past seven years. If we just go over there and ask them to stop parking their car in that spot it could be perceived as racially insensitivity, right? Or am I being too sensitive? Do we need to strike up a couple of meaningless, how’s the weather, conversations with them first before we ask them to rework their life around our truck? I’m not opposed to becoming friends with them, but my luck will run out before we become friends.

Denouement: That’s up to you. Help us figure out what to do.

Thanks!

Friday 13: Cheap Dates

I’m easy. To please that is.

Let me explain that. I’m all for dates both expensive and cheap. I’m just as comfortable dressing up in a gown, eating steak and lobster, and hobnobbing with the rich and famous (those who think they are) as I am dressing in jeans and going people watching at the mall while eating Krystals. Both types are fabulous fun for me. I’m so blessed that I get to do both, though neither not near as often as I’d like.

That being said, we’re not made of money and so most of our date nights have to be on the frugal side. Here are some ways I think a cheap date could actually be a good thing:

FRIDAY 13: 13 Cheap Dates

  1. The bookstore. This is my favorite cheap date right now. We go, get coffee and chai and browse the books for as long as we possibly can. Then we browse the magazines. Then we browse the sale aisles. We reluctantly leave either when I’m frozen (see this post) or it’s time to head back home.
  2. People watching. We haven’t done this in a while, well, because for two years we didn’t have a place to go people watch. We’re living withing ten minutes of at least three different shopping centers now so I plan on doing lots of it. It’s fun to make up stories about people or, heaven forbid, try to eavesdrop. It brings you closer together when you’re planning out others futures.
  3. Walk in the park. Our best walk in the park was in Vienna, Austria. It was just dusk and there were several couples walking hand in hand enjoying the crisp, cool air. We were admiring the golden busts and statues poised along the walkways. All of the sudden, out of the bushes, comes a man in a loose coat, hands in his pockets. NO, get your minds out of the gutter. As we were walking by he quietly whispers, “hashish?” and let us just continue walking. At first we had to check with each other to make sure we heard correctly. Firstly, because we were used to trying to “hear” things in German and we were confirming that “hashish” did indeed mean the same thing in any language. Secondly, because…wha!?! Who does that?!? We’d never been propositioned before. To this day that one word sends our minds back and reminiscing about our trip to Vienna.
  4. Star gazing. If you can afford a telescope it’s even better. This can only happen if it’s warm outside. I ain’t sitting out under the stars shaking and just wishing I was back indoors. We went star gazing at White Sands, NM once. It was amazing to lay on a dune of the finest sand in the world, gaze up at the most stars we’d ever seen before (and probably never will see again) and even see satellites orbit the earth. My mind really begins to ponder big things when I star gaze. I always leave with an awakened awe of God.
  5. Adult “toy” stores. Get ’em outta the gutter people. I ain’t goin’ there on this blog. Adults like to play as much as kids do. Our toys are just bigger and more expensive. It’s fun to go in stores like The Sharper Image, Hammacher Schlemmammammaccherrr, Bath & Body Works…and just browse. It’s kind of freeing knowing you’re just there to play so you’re not obligated to pull out the wallet. Get a free massage in one of their multi-million dollar full-body massage chairs. Try out every single lotion in the store and leave smelling like that million bucks.
  6. Volunteer. This is something I’d like to do more of, and now that we’re settled I can start looking around for places to volunteer. Many volunteer opportunities aren’t conducive to having kids around. Going with your spouse to help others can be one of the most fulfilling dates you go on.
  7. Go on walks in those neighborhoods. You know, the neighborhoods you’ll never be able to afford to live in, but isn’t it loads of fun to mentally create your dream house? We did this throughout our “four year honeymoon” in Germany. Whew! Our “retirement home” had all the trappings of a medieval castle, complete with turrets and a moat. And a hall of mirrors. And a grotto. We were living high on the hog…in our minds at least.
  8. Ice Cream. There’s something about getting a scoop in a cone (a cup for me) that makes you feel younger. Maybe even like a kid again. Talking about life while eating ice cream makes everything a little bit lighter. You think of new ways to tackle old problems while eating that frozen goodness.
  9. High School football games. Or college if you’re close to a town that has a smaller school. These games are fun to go to because you get the thrill of competition (albeit on a smaller scale) on the cheap. Take your stadium seats and blankets. Get a little stadium food. A watered down Coke. Be amazed at how much high school kids have changed since you were in school. Be thankful you didn’t act like that. And ladies, if you don’t know much about football, these games are easier for your hubby to explain the ins and outs (yes, high school, college and pro rules are different but the basic premise is still the same).
  10. Community events. Many towns, larger ones especially seem to go out of their way to always have something going on. Jazz nights downtown; free nights at the museum; festivals at the river walk; free days at the zoo. Get in touch with your Chamber of Commerce or Visitor’s Bureau to see what’s on the calendar in your area.
  11. Geocaching or letterboxing. I’ve mentioned these before. With geocaching you do have make the initial investment of a GPS Receiver, but those are fairly cheap now days. With letterboxing all you need to buy is a stamp (with ink, not postage) and a note pad. Enjoy the thrill of mystery solving together while getting out in nature and enjoying your surroundings. We love doing both of these even if it is for different personal reasons. Du likes to get out in nature and enjoy the day. It’s the thrill of the hunt for me and the more we find in a day the better. We’re still together though.
  12. Dinner and a movie in. If you’ve got someone who can take your kids away from the house it’s fun just to stay at home and hang out there. Set rules though. No bills, no computer (what?!), no phones. Just you, your spouse, your favorite drink and a good movie. If you’re lucky enough your kids will be spending the night somewhere else.
  13. Miniature golf. Putt Putt! This is fun to do even if it’s just to make a total fool of yourself. I don’t play to win at mini golf, I play to see how many strokes I can actually take. Well, it’s not that bad, but I’m there to have fun. This also takes you back to younger freer times. If you don’t feel younger after a game of Putt Putt then I’m not sure anything would help.


 In 1996. Married for a couple of months.

 
Jan 2006. 10 Years of Cheap Dates.

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How about you? Are you a cheap date? What are your favorite (cheap) ways to go out with your honey?

Story Time Goes To The Dogs

I knew it wouldn’t take long for this segment to go to the dogs. But, thankfully, I’m pulling out the flea bombs and after this week we’ll be parasite free and ready to roll.

Here’s what you do:

  1. Look at photo below.
  2. Comment on photo below (with a story or caption about what’s going on).
  3. I read comments on photo below.
  4. I laugh so hard coke comes out my nose. The drink, people, I don’t do drugs. You get the idea.
  5. You once again make my Thursday. All because of the photo below. Simple really.

This was taken with my old cell phone so the pics pretty small. That’s a dog. In a car. Behind the steering wheel.

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As for last week’s gem (go ahead, click. It will open up a new tab or window) let me explain…My mother is one awesome gift giver. We went to visit her and my brother and sister-in-law recently. In July. Mom couldn’t wait until December to give us our Christmas gifts so we had Christmas in July. A Wii and Guitar Hero. She rocks. Actually I rock as evidenced by the picture I posted. We were having a friendly family feud and I’m always game for making myself look like a total freak. Really, that’s all there is to it. I’m a closet rocker and like to let it out every now and then. I’ll have to find that one picture of me in my wedding dress…

Thanks for playing!

Proof of A-Retentiveness

We’re in the process of cleaning out all of our computers and backing up the info on external hard drives. So what, you ask? I just found some old information that made me laugh. I have mentioned that I’m no where near as anal and organized as I used to be.

During the good ole days of list making and making lists of the lists and then cross referencing those lists on a whole schematic I would spend hours if not days perfecting those dear lists. Those of you who are list makers yourselves understand.

And I give you one example of how crazy I was. Here is a screen shot of part of a three page document listing 22 stores and every single piece of information I could find about them. This was for my shopping trip to New York in 2005.

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Notice:

  • They are in alpha-numeric order
  • I’ve got everything listed including hours of operation; address(es); metro directions
  • The metros are color coordinated
  • I’ve got the sales tax listed at the top of each page
  • I’ve annotated what the store is if it wasn’t well known to me

Anal Retentive? Uh, just a little.

Now, here’s an example of my new way of list making: The plans for our Florida trip:

I jest, but it’s not as far from the truth as the old me shutters to realize.

I’m thinking I may need to go back to the old way of doing things if I want to feel in control of my life. Either that or start relying on God to show me where I’m disorganized and show me how to rearrange some things in my life. Hmmm….

Adventures in WiFi Searching

I’m free. For a couple hours. Du is the best father in the world because he has the girls on a Daddy/Daughter date. He likes doing those. Weekly. And now that we’re settled in after the move he can start doing those again.

I have designated Tuesday nights as scrapbooking night. Each Tuesday night I’m going to take a couple of hours to get my pics into an album. Once a month I’ll do it with the ladies in the neighborhood at the club house. Tonight I didn’t feel like going though. It’s been raining all day, which I’m actually happy about. The rain has given me a headache though. I wasn’t feeling very social, and I hadn’t gotten anything together. So I decided to head out to the nearest wifi hotspot and work on my Picaboo digital album.

This leads me to where I am now. I first tried a Panera Bread. Couldn’t even find a parking space. Headed back closer to home remembering that there’s a Books A Million I could try. Wait, is that another Panera I see? I actually got into this restaurant and the oneoutlet that is accessible to patrons was being used. And a bunch of teenage girls had just come in to eat, I guess. What do teenage girls like about Panera? I pulled into the BAM parking lot and reminded myself that there’s always Chick Fil-A, which wouldn’t be any less crowded than the first Panera I tried. We truly are a nation that would rather eat out than eat at home (too expensive for us though). Thankfully there was an outlet with my name on it and a quiet corner just for me at BAM.

So here I sit and I haven’t started scrapbooking yet. I did want to let you know some things I’ve observed so far:

  • gum that comes in a plastic case you can attach to your key chain. How cool is that. I want one.
  • sunflower seeds…covered in candy coated chocolate. Where have you been all my life?
  • a woman speaking on the cell phone in an accent I can only place as French with strong Eastern European tendencies. Couldn’t figure out what she was saying.
  • a kid begging his dad to buy him a toy every day of the week. Apparently this dad only gets to see his kid a couple of days a week. I laugh knowing that what is first and foremost important to the kid is possessions…and feel sorry for the dad. But I know that kid will come to realize how much his father did for him when he was little. Then he’ll feel bad for bugging his dad about the toys he didn’t have and be grateful for the ones Daddy did buy him. And from what Daddy says, he buys the kid something each weekend. Too much in my opinion, but when you’re divorced you gotta go to extremes sometimes. 

Off to scrapbook. I promise.

The Video Audition

You may recall that one of the six weird, random and unspectacular things about me was that I auditioned to be in a video.  I didn’t finish the story because it was getting too long for that list and I didn’t want blood on my hands. I only got one comment about any of the six things (and thanks, Kelly, for wondering about navels), so I was right, they truly were unspectacular. Since absolutely none of you commented about the audition story I’m going to finish telling it to you anyway. That’s how much of a weird and unspectacular friend I am. Deep down you know you’re wondering how video auditions go.

To recap: I was buying a tape (I don’t even think it was a CD) of Deadeye Dick sometime in 93 or 94. The guy behind me asked why I was buying it. “I like the music” was my response (duh!). “Well, I’m their manager and we’re holding auditions for their video. You should come by.” He told me I had the “all-American” look they were going for. He told me the time and place of the audition and to just show up. I can’t remember if the audition was actually that day or what. This part of the story probably did take place on a Friday or Saturday so the audition was probably sometime that weekend. I love how my brain just doesn’t work.

You all thought he was just hitting on me didn’t you? I showed up at the audition, not alone. It was being talked about on 99X so I knew it was legit, but I wasn’t about to go alone. I just remember waiting in a long line on a hot day with other girls ranging in age from teen all the way up to the geriatric set way too old to be in a song about a “New Age Girl”. And why he thought an all-American look would work well as a “new age” girl I’ll never know. Some girls were dressed how they thought a new age girl would look like in a video. I did not fit in.

Quite a few of the girls were carrying portfolios. Me? I was carrying maybe a purse. No head shots. No pictures of me proving that I was worthy of being in a video. So unprofessional. I was in the big leagues (for a Deadeye Dick video, right) and I was showing up without my bat.

 It was finally my turn. Several other ladies and I were taken to this dimly lit room where we lined up in front of three judges. I’m not kidding. They were sitting behind a table with Coke cups. Ok, I am kidding about that. The girls with portfolios quickly handed them to the judges. We were lined up under the only lights in the room. One by one they called each of our names. When a name was called the girl was to step forward, turn around and step back. Here is where quick thinking and ingenuity would have come in handy. I have neither.

I was probably the third girl to be called. Wasn’t the first, but wasn’t one of the later ones who could play off what a previous girl had done. My name was called. I stepped forward. Turned on cue. Stepped back. One of the next who was called stepped forward, did a cute little turn and some other business that made her stand out from the crowd, and then stepped back. “Dang!” I thought to myself, “why didn’t I do something like that?” Well, Vicki, you’re a rule follower and rarely think outside the box. That’s why.

We were told that we would get a call if we were the chosen girl. The manager, not being very smart (but I think we’ve already established that) had given me his number at the record store. Why? Not quite sure. Maybe he was trying to prove who he was. Maybe he was hitting on me, but I was too naive to catch on. I ended up calling him stalker-like for the next day or two as I sat impatiently on my couch waiting for the phone to actually ring. It never rang.

 And thank God it didn’t because look at what they did: